WHY IT WILL BE OBAMA VS. GINGRICH IN 2012

 

Gingrich can run as an outsider, having not held public office since, what, 1934?  Okay, it was 1999, but that’s eleven years, in politics an epoch.  And he was blissfully out of power for 9/11, Iraq, the meltdown, all that ghastliness.  He’s well outside the Beltway.  And yet…

He can run as someone who’s familiar with the feel of the helm on our ship of state.  After all, as House Speaker (1995-99), he was second in line to the Oval Office had Clinton bit the dust.

He will play to the GOP’s red meat frothy screaming rightists better than anybody but the baked Alaskan.  He will have the advantage over her, of course, of being able to make sense and having a higher IQ than a bird feeder.  Oh sure, even he is outflanked to starboard by Ron Paul, but the Paulistas are no longer really on the political grid.

He has often displayed an ability to casually, easily, convincingly and unashamedly lie like a guy caught with the dictator’s daughter, a facility that GOP voters seem not just to forgive, but applaud and reward, as long as it is exercised in the process of vilifying libs.

Who can beat him?  Mitt?  Be serious. The man’s not a POTUS, he’s a GQ model, for Chrissake.  The GOP base has never liked nor trusted him and never will, which may be the high water mark of the base’s political acumen.  The Mittster would and will — not to put too fine a point on it  —  fuck the Pope’s cat in the ass on YouTube if it would get him elected.  

Gingrich, despite his self-portrayal as a man marinated in principles, is a gut fighter who can be utterly unprincipled, ruthless, vicious and vile in attacking anything he perceives as not in his best interest, and who will happily eviscerate any Republican standing between him and the brass ring.

He can come off as extremely professorial and intellectual when it serves his purpose; in contrast, almost nobody else with serious rightwing appeal can go on the Sunday Morning TV talkies without sounding like Chicken Little.  

He’s the domestic pol version of the Middle-east leader who says one thing in Arabic/Hebrew and another thing in English figuring, usually correctly, that both sides will buy it. 

And finally, who else, really, do they have in the Presidential pipeline?  Beyond the Newtinator, I crane my neck, and yet in all directions, naught do I espy.

Then again, I didn’t see Barak coming for at least two years after his 2004 convention speech, whereas Gloria was ready to start a campaign fund drive before the applause had even died down.

Nevertheless, if I were a betting man (and given my track record, surely a much poorer one), my money would be on Newt and Obama locking horns two years hence.  Certainly in a theatrical sense — which is increasingly indistinguishable from the political sense — it would be the bout of choice.

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